Small Forest Creature

Back in the days when I was trying (unsuccessfully) to make sex work for me, I often felt like my libido was a small forest creature.

I'd be walking along a trail through the forest of life when I would suddenly hear some rustling in the bushes.  I pause and look.  Is it... yes!  Yes!  It's libido!  We have confirmed its presence!  It was a rush of joy, followed by... panic.

Oh God, don't scare it off!  Avoid eye contact, no sudden movements.  Wait for it to come closer, don't crowd it.  If I do this just right, I'll bet I can get my libido to stick around long enough to actually, ya know, do something with it.  We can get this party going, yet!

Of course, this strategy rarely worked.  In my frantic attempts to stay calm, I'd quickly lose any sexy inclinations that I'd had.  This series of events, this frenzied internal monologue, repeated itself many, many times.  It was not a pleasant time, but it was an important stage along the way for me.

I don't hunt my libido anymore.  It comes out from time to time, on its own terms, and that's okay.